Being laid off gave me the opportunity to spend a lot more time with Sugar. Since I wasn’t working, Sugar and I got to spend time bonding during the day. During this time, I realized that Sugar’s daily shenanigans were funny, which sparked the idea for Pupcake Sugar.
However, when I got a new job, Sugar and my daily routine was going to have to change. I was excited for the new job, but surprisingly started to feel guilty about leaving Sugar home by herself all day. In this blog post, we’re discussing dog mom guilty. Yes, it’s a real thing. So, we’re also sharing strategies to help you get rid of it.
WHAT IS DOG MOM GUILT
Dog mom guilt is the feeling that you’re somehow not doing enough for your dog. In fact, dog mom (or dog parent) guilt is more normal that people may think. In a study conducted by Barkbus 80% of dog owners feel guilty when leaving their dog home. The study also concluded that 71% of dogs suffer from separation anxiety, which can make the dog mom guilt even worse. Dog mom guilt can come from a variety of different reasons, such as:
- Leaving your dog alone for too long
- Not engaging in enough play or letting your dog get enough exercise.
- Spending less time with your dog
- Falling behind on grooming or other care services
- Dog is in pain or hurt.
HOW TO GET RID OF DOG MOM GUILT
Guilt of any kind can take its toll on your well-being. Dogs are sensitive to our emotions, which includes stress, anxiety, and guilt. This can impact the overall health, happiness, and well-being of not just dog moms, but their dogs too. So, it’s important to address these feelings and manage them effectively.
When it was time for me to go back to work, I had to put some strategies in place to help Sugar and I settle into our new routine. Here are a few strategies that worked for us.
Schedule Quality Time – Set aside time for you and your dog to spend time together. Planning a dog mommy and me activity during this time helps too. Sugar loves pupcakes. So, I would bake her a pupcake and then spend time with her around that pupcake. Whether it was a treat after a walk outside, sitting on the couch watching movies, or even playing with her in the house, adding a pupcake makes the experience a lot more special for us.
Build A Routine – Dogs are good at understanding routine. It helps with training and helps them set expectations. So, try to build a routine with your dog like walking at the same time each morning. I place Sugar’s food down at her eating station before I leave for work. This signals to her that I’m leaving, however she knows that I’m coming back. Building a routine that works well for you and your dog may help reduce anxiety, which can alleviate some of that dog mom guilt.
Hire Some Help – Dog moms can do anything. But we can’t do everything. So, hire some professional help, if you can, to help assist with some of those tasks that our schedules make it difficult to complete. Examples may be hiring a groomer, dog walker to walk your dog when you’re not available to, or even leaving your dog with someone you trust while you’re away for a few days.
Friends & Family Support – Ask your friends and family to step in during those times when you need some extra support. For instance, see if one of your friends can watch your dog instead of putting your dog in a kennel. Especially, if your dog knows and loves this person. This way you know that even though you’re not there, your dog will be loved and cared for like you want. And if you’re like me, this gives you can Facetime with your dog when you get a few moments.
Lean Into Your Feelings – Give yourself some grace and allow yourself to sit in your feelings for a little bit. This will help you identify when that guilty feeling is creeping up on you so that you can solve them. When we know how we’re feeling about something or why we’re feeling it, it’s easier to create a solution to the problem.
WAYS TO HELP REDUCE SEPARATION ANXIETY FOR YOUR DOG
For the first few days after I went back to work, Sugar whined when I left the house. In fact, I could hear her whining through the door, which made me feel even worse. So, I had to find ways to keep her calm as we got back into regular work routine. Here are a few things I tried to help alleviate some of the anxiety Sugar was feeling.
Leave Your Dog with Favorite Toy – Most dogs have a favorite toy. Sugar’s is a fuzzy pink slipper my mom gave her years ago. Before you leave the house, give your dog his or her favorite toy to play with. Sometimes leaving an old shirt or piece of clothing with your scent on it also helps. This way they can snuggle with it while you’re gone.
Send Dog on a Scavenger Hunt – Hide a pupcake in the house and let them search for it. While their sniffing around, it keeps them occupied and lessens the anxiety in watching you leave. When I leave for work, I put Sugar’s food down on the floor so I can leave while she’s eating. It reduces her stress levels, and it also builds routine.
Try Some Sounds – Leave the TV on or put on some calming music. This way your dog isn’t alone in a quiet house. If you’re dog has a favorite area to sit, it’s also a nice idea to let the music or television play in the area. This way your dog can find comfort listening to his or her favorite sounds and get cozy in his or her favorite area.
Keep the Light On – I always leave a light on for Sugar. It keeps her from sitting in the dark. Especially, if I’m going to home before nighttime. It also prevents me form walking to a dark house and possibly tripping over Sugar when she meets me at the door, which can be a problem for both of us.
Take A Long Walk – Every parent that’s been to a birthday party knows that “those kids are gonna sleep good tonight” after running around all day. The same philosophy works for dogs. Go on a long walk before you leave the house. Exercise helps reduce anxiety. After a long walk and jumping around, Sugar is tired and has no problem taking a nap. So, it helps her rest a little better even when I’m not home.
TURN DOG MOM GUILT INTO A SELF-CARE ROUTINE
I’m always an advocate of turning a problem into a solution. Dog mom guilt can also be a signal that it’s time to lean into your health and wellness a little more. Below are some activities you can do with your dog to practice self-care.
Exercise – Go for a walk or take a workout class with your dog. There may be some doga classes or other dog mommy and me classes in your area for you to take together. If not, you can create your own dog mommy and me workout routine in the house or in your neighborhood.
Baking Pupcakes – Baking is more than just a mindfulness activity. It’s a way to spend quality time with the ones you love, including your dog. Baking a new pupcake recipe is also a great way to tap into your creativity, which is a self-care practice. Sugar gets so happy when she sees me pull the pupcakes out of the oven, which brings joyful energy to the house. Being around joy is also a great self-care strategy.
Teach Your Dog a New Trick – A great self-care practice is trying something new. Teaching your dog how to do a new trick gives you and your dog a sense of accomplishment, which also sparks joy and excitement. It also gives you and your dog a chance to spend time together.
Take Some Me Time – Releasing dog mom guilt takes practice. Scheduling time to go out and do the things you need to do for you (i.e., work, spend time with friends, etc.) builds a routine for your dog. It helps the dog learn that no matter how many times you leave the house, you’re coming back. This helps with some of the anxiety that your dog may feel.
Dog Mom Community – Connect with other dog moms. Whether you get together with your dogs or without them, having a community that understands the dog mom lifestyle. Consider exploring pet care blogs, mental health support forums for pet owners, and joining online communities dedicated to dog lovers. These resources can provide additional tips, support, and a sense of belonging to a wider community of pet owners navigating similar challenges.
Talk to a Professional – If you feel that your dog mom guilt is becoming overwhelming, it’s ok to seek professional help. If your feelings of guilt are impacting your mental health or if you notice significant behavioral changes in your dog, it may be time to seek professional help. Veterinarians, animal behaviorists, and mental health professionals can offer support and strategies to manage these feelings effectively.
Feeling dog mom guilt is normal. And there are ways to solve it. So, it’s important to remember to focus on the positive aspects of how you care for your dog. Embrace dog mommy hood with open arms and remember that you’re doing an amazing job.
Pupcake Sugar is a safe space for dog moms to love without judgement. Have you ever suffered from dog mom guilt? I know I have. How did you deal with it? Share your stories, advice, and connect with us @pupcakesugar.
Sign up for the Pupcake Sugar mailing list to get Sugar’s favorite birthday pupcake recipe to try at home with your dog. Also, check out the Shop page for more of Sugar’s pupcake recipes and the stories that inspired them.
You’ll also get a chance to step into Sugar’s world. I love my dog, Sugar, and her daily shenanigans make me laugh. So, I created an illustrated character inspired by her and her love of pupcakes. Sugar’s character is a “pupcakepreneur” that owns and operates her own pupcakery called Pupcake Sugar. It’s a tongue twister, but it’s amazing what you can create when you let your imagination lead the way.
